What Recovery from People-Pleasing Really Looks Like

(Spoiler: It's Not Perfect)

You might think that healing from people-pleasing means never saying yes when you don’t want to, always setting clear boundaries, and confidently taking up space. But real recovery? It’s messier than that.

What It Actually Looks Like:

• Feeling guilty after saying no—but doing it anyway.

• Setting a boundary and then second-guessing it for days.

• Noticing you're people-pleasing again, but catching it sooner.

• Choosing your needs even when it disappoints someone you care about.

Recovery is full of small wins and hard moments. Sometimes you regress. Sometimes you speak up and feel awful. But over time, you start seeing progress:

• You pause before answering instead of automatically saying yes.

• You stop over-explaining your decisions.

• You care a little less about being liked—and more about being at peace.

My book, Breaking Free from People-Pleasing, explores these imperfect moments with honesty and compassion. It’s not about doing recovery “right”—it’s about showing up, again and again, for yourself.

Self-compassion is key. You're not failing—you're practicing.