Journey to Healing:

People-pleasing is often a survival strategy—especially for those who grew up in chaotic, unpredictable, or emotionally unsafe environments. You learned that being agreeable and accommodating kept the peace. You learned that saying yes meant staying connected.

Trauma can challenge core beliefs about safety, trust, and the world’s fairness. It may leave survivors feeling lost, abandoned, or disconnected—not only from themselves and others but also from their spiritual beliefs. Some may question their faith or feel anger toward a higher power. Others might find new or renewed spiritual meaning that helps them rebuild and find peace.

People-pleasing might feel like the “right” thing to do—until it starts to chip away at your sense of self. You might feel anxious all the time, constantly worried about what others think of you. You might carry guilt for things that aren’t even yours to hold. You might feel resentful toward others—even though you’re the one who agreed to help.

Trauma survivors often experience grief not only for what was lost but also for the ways trauma has changed their lives, relationships, and sense of self. Understanding these complexities is an important step toward healing and reclaiming hope.

People-pleasing isn’t a character flaw. It’s a survival strategy—one your nervous system learned to rely on when you were younger, often in response to trauma, emotional neglect, or unsafe relationships. When being yourself didn’t feel safe, you learned to be who others needed you to be. When setting boundaries led to rejection or punishment, you learned to stay quiet and go along to get along. You adapted in the best ways you could, not to manipulate or seek attention—but t

Dissociation is a way your mind disconnects from reality to protect you from intense distress. It can involve feeling detached from your thoughts, body, emotions, or surroundings. While mild dissociation, like drifting off during a boring meeting, happens to most people occasionally, chronic or severe dissociation is often rooted in trauma.

Dissociation is a natural defense mechanism that allows your mind to disconnect from overwhelming thoughts, feelings, or experiences. It’s often linked to trauma, but it can also occur in response to stress, anxiety, or even boredom. While dissociation serves as a protective response, it can interfere with your ability to fully engage in life and cause disruptions in your emotional and physical well-being.

EMDR is a therapeutic approach developed to help individuals process traumatic memories by using bilateral stimulation. The goal of EMDR is to desensitize the emotional charge attached to these memories, allowing them to be processed and integrated in a healthier way. While it was initially developed for PTSD, EMDR has proven effective for many types of trauma, including complex trauma. By reprocessing distressing memories, EMDR helps individuals reduce the emotional intensit

People-pleasing isn’t about being nice—it’s about survival. Many of us learned to prioritize others’ emotions as a way to feel safe, accepted, or loved. But when that pattern becomes automatic, it can lead to resentment, burnout, and a loss of connection with your own needs.

Emotional dissociation is a psychological phenomenon where a person feels disconnected or detached from their emotions, thoughts, or even their sense of identity. It’s as if your mind and body are no longer on the same page, causing you to feel like you're outside of yourself. This disconnection can manifest in a variety of ways, from feeling numb to having difficulty experiencing joy or sadness, or even forgetting certain events or aspects of your life.

At the core of CPT is the idea that trauma can distort our thinking patterns, leading to negative beliefs about ourselves, others, and the world. These distorted thoughts, also known as "stuck points," can prevent healing and cause individuals to feel trapped in the trauma’s grip. Through CPT, clients work to identify these stuck points, challenge them, and replace them with healthier, more balanced perspectives.

These patterns were likely learned, not chosen—and that means they can be unlearned too. Healing from people-pleasing isn’t about becoming selfish or cold—it’s about coming back to yourself with love, boundaries, and a voice that’s finally heard.

At its core, dissociation is a protective response. It’s the mind’s way of disconnecting from something too painful, overwhelming, or threatening to fully process at the time. Dissociation can show up in many different ways, such as: Feeling numb or emotionally "shut off" Losing chunks of time (memory gaps) Feeling like you’re outside of your body Detaching from your surroundings (feeling like the world isn’t real) Zoning out during stressful situations

In IFS, "parts" are inner voices or subpersonalities that each carry their own perspective and role. You might recognize some of your parts without even realizing it—like the part of you that gets super anxious before a big event, the part that criticizes you when you make a mistake, or the part that pushes you to achieve and succeed.

When you're caught in dissociation, it can feel like there’s no easy way back to the here and now. The good news is: it is possible to ground yourself again—and you don’t have to figure it out alone. Let's talk about some grounding techniques that actually work when you're dissociating.

When you've been hurt in the past, especially by people you trusted, it changes the way you view the world. Trauma can plant deep-seated beliefs like, “I’m not safe,” “I can’t trust anyone,” or “I’m not good enough.” Even when you consciously know a relationship is safe, your nervous system might still stay on high alert, scanning for signs of danger. It’s not about being "too sensitive" or "overreacting." It's your brain and body doing their best to protect you based on p

The truth is, dissociation is a natural response to overwhelming stress or trauma, and many people experience it to some degree.

This isn’t your fault. Your brain is doing what it was wired to do, but healing is possible.

Let me be clear: You are not broken. What you’re experiencing is the impact of complex trauma, and there is a reason for everything you feel

It’s not just about what’s happening right now; it’s about everything that moment reminds your nervous system of.