How to Talk to Your Therapist About Trauma
- andersonabbiek
- Dec 20, 2024
- 3 min read

Opening up about trauma in therapy can feel overwhelming. You may worry about where to start, feel unsure if you’re ready, or fear being judged. These feelings are valid and common. However, sharing your experiences with a trauma-informed therapist can be a transformative step toward healing. Here’s how to approach this conversation in a way that feels safe and empowering.
1. Start at Your Comfort Level
You don’t have to dive into the deepest details right away—or ever. Trauma therapy is about meeting you where you are. You can begin by describing the impact of your experiences instead of the events themselves. For example, you might say, “I’ve been feeling disconnected from myself,” or “I get anxious in certain situations and I don’t know why.”
Therapists trained in trauma, such as EMDR or CPT therapists, are skilled at guiding these conversations gently, helping you feel supported without rushing.
2. Set Boundaries Around What You Share
It’s okay to hold back details if you’re not ready to share them. Let your therapist know what feels safe. You can say something like, “I want to talk about something difficult, but I might not go into specifics right now.”
This communicates your needs clearly and allows your therapist to respect your pace.
3. Use Writing or Visuals If Speaking Feels Too Hard

If verbalizing your thoughts is too difficult, consider writing a note or journaling about your experience beforehand. Sharing a journal entry, a letter, or even artwork can help communicate what you’re feeling.
For example, if you’re working with a therapist in North Dakota specializing in trauma therapy, you can email your thoughts before the session or bring a written account to help guide the conversation.
4. Acknowledge Your Fears About Sharing
It’s natural to worry about judgment or not being believed when talking about trauma. Sharing these fears with your therapist can help them understand how to create a space that feels safer for you.
Try saying something like, “I’ve never talked about this before, and I’m scared about how it will be received.” A trauma-informed therapist will validate these feelings and ensure your concerns are heard.
5. Lean on Grounding Techniques Before and After
Discussing trauma can bring up strong emotions, so it’s helpful to prepare yourself with grounding techniques. Your therapist can guide you through strategies like deep breathing, mindfulness, or physical grounding exercises to help you stay present.
You might also explore tools like EMDR therapy, which uses bilateral stimulation to process traumatic memories without becoming overwhelmed.

6. Focus on What You Hope to Achieve
Instead of feeling pressured to recount everything, think about the outcome you’re seeking. Are you looking for relief from flashbacks? Do you want to improve relationships or feel more in control of your emotions? Sharing these goals with your therapist can shape the direction of your sessions.
7. Remember, You Are in Control
Talking about trauma doesn’t mean reliving it. Therapy allows you to process your experiences safely and at your own pace. Your therapist is there to guide you, but you decide what to share and when.
Healing Is a Journey

Opening up about trauma takes courage. By working with a skilled trauma therapist—whether you’re exploring EMDR, CPT, or IFS—you can create a path to healing that feels right for you. Remember, therapy is a partnership, and your voice matters every step of the way.
If you’re seeking support, I’m here to help. Whether you’re in North Dakota or anywhere else, trauma therapy can offer a safe space to start healing. You don’t have to face this alone. Let’s take the next step together.
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